Each week I take a question off my Facebook Page to answer here in this column.
Shelia A writes: My father is dying from cancer. How can I help him through the dying process without losing it my self?
It is a blessing to help another soul move on from this plane to the next.
A very private and personal thing. Every death is unique as every birth is.
All deaths are attended by angelic spirits who know exactly what to do and when to do it.
Your dad also will intuitively know how to move on. Don’t feel like it is all up to you to “do something”.
You can offer prayers for extra light and love to bless him and help him digest this experience.
I think it is important to wait on the grieving part as much as possible and send them messages to move on into the light when they are ready.
It is not a good idea to beg them to stay!!!! That puts stress on the soul and that is the last thing they need to worry about.
Be assured you will see your loved one on the other side some day. You can let them know that too.
Let them know you appreciate being a part of their journey.
Do your forgiveness work if you need to.
It is good to have some nice music that is comforting to them in the back ground, I was taught to sing their death song. Since most of us don’t have that, sing a song that feels right as their death song. A song that says is all for them. Hum if nothing else.
You can light some candles and burn some nice incense if it feels right. Candles and the fire element send out a signal that you are aligned with the light, it invites more of the same into the room to be a blessing for your dad.
Sometimes it takes a while for the soul to pull out of the physical shell. Your dad might seem to be talking to spirits that are not there.
Not to worry, that is natural. I think it is good to give him 3 full days after he passes to do a service and then think about your own grief process.
But if you can hold that space while he is in transition, that can be a big help. We don’t need distractions from the family while we are in the middle of the death transition. We need to be able to focus on merging with the light.
That is one reason I encourage you to meditate with the light all the time, so when your death journey is in process you will be familiar with the light and can make the most of this powerful experience.
Trust your instincts to know what to do for him, as long as you have the intention to be a blessing to him., you will get the nudges from spirit as to “how”.
I am sending you a big hug!!!
(c) Aug 2015